Owl's Nest


TLDR: any pronouns, genderqueer butch, total nerd.

"And here we see Owl in its natural habitat- here at the National Institute for Polymorphic Abominations, we do our best to mimic the biomes our creatures would live in outside of captivity. It's good for their well-being. We all know that a happy abomination is a healthy abomination, and no one wants to know what happens when we forget to provide enrichment for the day! Rest in peace, Dave.

"Our staff work very hard to provide daily enrichment for our creatures. Owl here likes creative enrichment, so we chuck some MIDI keyboards and craft supplies in there for it. That keeps it happy enough. Sometimes it binds books for the gift shop. We'd sell the dolls it paints too, but it bit off the head of the last employee who tried to collect them, so we let it have its little doll corner in there. It's also written a few websites and Python programs, but we can't legally share those without a cognitohazard permit, and we all know how expensive those are! Haha, we're broke. I think it's learning C, in which case gods help us all.

"If you look through the window, you'll see that it's currently alone in its enclosure. Rest assured that we're trying to find a compatible horror to share its enclosure, but none of the veterinarians are entirely sure what it is to begin with. We swear it keeps changing when we're not looking. The Ethereal Chimps love it though! I've never seen such a cute interspecies friendship among nonsensical horrors. Guest passes for their playdates are $30.00 per person at admission. Snap yours up while they last!

"If you're here for some in-depth observation, pop on over to the tour booth. We walk guests through Owl's enclosure weekly for free! We are not liable for any bites, face removals, peanut butter thefts, limb replacements, or other maimings that may occur. Enter the FAQ tours at your own risk."

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